The Friday Blog: Nul Points
I wonder, do you suppose, if it says anything at all meaningful about the current state of the United Kingdom, that our entry recorded the dreaded nul points at Eurovision? Probably not, but, then again, those whose musical tolerances can not quite accommodate “full camp” and who tried to avoid the entire spectacle altogether (impressive as I actually thought it was) by investing 20 quid on live-streaming Glastonbury, were to find that the links to Worthy Farm stubbornly refused to take them there.
Indeed, my principal telly watching was the European Champions Cup final, a game contested by two French teams. Britain did, at least, have representation in the competition’s second tier, courtesy of the once world beating Leicester Tigers, but they went on to lose to another of Lefrancois. French dominance of European club rugby may, in part, be explained by the gallic approach to following rules and regulations generally, and specifically those that relate to the payment of players and the so called “salary cap.” It is quite hard to fathom that the leading sides from across the Channel, whose squads are replete with a jaw-dropping array of global talent, have not suffered the same fate as Saracens. The North Londoners, incidentally, having been embarrassed by the mighty Cornish Pirates at Mennaye Field recently, are now really beginning to take it out on the rest of the Championship. Poor old Cov, a proud and still ambitious club, whose supporters are amongst the nicest people you could wish to meet, shipped a try approximately every seven minutes on Saturday. I can tell you now, that being on the receiving end to that extent makes playing Rugby Football a particularly miserable way to spend your afternoons.
Me being me, I cannot help but think that there is some sort of parallel with the shelter offered by the Common Agricultural Policy. It never seemed to be that popular, until, that is, it is not available anymore. The opportunities from reduced friction in trade that so excite our sector, where international standards are, perhaps, more universally observed, continue to frighten the life out of our farmers. It was, I fear, ever thus. I think Old MacDonald et al, would be well advised to start an orchestrated and concerted campaign to remind us just how high the standards of animal husbandry and food quality we enjoy in our country actually are. It would then be down to the Great British public to acknowledge that at the checkout by paying a bit more for the Red Tractor. How many votes do you think that will poll when it comes to the clutch?
One man who may give you an answer is George Eustice. In my book, the MP for Falmouth and Camborne has had a good week, if only by nothing other than dint of still being the Environment Secretary, not something I would have imagined seven days ago. Diversity in thought is important I suppose, but discussions around the Cabinet table would have been nothing if not interesting. Eustice’s somewhat protectionist view of the world would seem to be incompatible, you might have thought fatally so, with the more global ambition of his oppo in International Trade, Liz Truss.
Eustice had fall guy written all over him and it was sending some of the hacks’ minds into overdrive. You will know I am not one for conspiracy theories. I have witnessed so many and been party to enough over the years to know that real people are not nearly as clever or well informed as the Machiavellian characters who inhabit the fictitious Westminster village. Not that you would know that if you had been following the weekend’s political gossip columns. Take those as read and you would have been legging it down to Ladbrokes to put next month’s mortgage payment on a reshuffle on Wednesday to divert attention from The Dom’s appearance in front of assorted committee dwelling MPs. The theory may have had some mileage in my post Friday festivities beer befuddled brain, but thinking about it again after sufficient tea, it did not stack up. To be a significant enough distraction, merely reshuffling a Eustice, or even just giving him a straight red card to the backbenches, is not going to do it. That, in my opinion, so beat the rush and complain now, in the case of Farmer George, would only be to return someone to where they can once again operate, to coin a medical term, at the top of their licence. To be big enough, the distraction would need to remove some big hitters and the conspiracists had Matt Hancock in the frame, which, the way things turned out, is kind of ironic. And the way things turned out, it would probably have taken the resignation of Boris himself to come even close to usurping the story.
I am still not really sure what to make of Cummings’s performance, likely to be his last in public for a while. You have to admire his stamina. Seven hours he was at it. I cannot even sleep for that long. It has been billed as explosive, it was salacious in places and painted a picture of a chaotic environment in Downing Street. But, there is the ‘so what?’ question to consider. I am not sure there were any real revelations, nothing that was not already known, trailed elsewhere or a fairly safe assumption. His opinions on the capability of various ministers are exactly that. His opinions. Nothing more, nothing less. And I wonder if you had the fly on the wall version of goings on in any government headquarters, especially during the early, uncertain stages of the pandemic, it would have been anything other than chaotic. The main problem, for those who might want to see this seriously damage the Johnson administration, is the messenger. Yes, there were mistakes, and it is hard not to believe we have been slow to react, and probably continue to be slow to react, and no, we should not have consistently topped the charts for death rates. These are charges the Government will, rightly, have to answer in time, but the man who is trying to blow the doors off right now is Dominic Cummings, and he has an axe to grind. His integrity has been fatally compromised by his actions, he has never been popular and his humility and admission of culpability are being seen by some as coming far too late in the day. I do not see this as Boris’s Geoffrey Howe moment. What it will have achieved is to make sure Hancock is safe in his job. If relieving the Health Secretary of his brief had ever crossed the mind of the PM (depends who you believe), it will not happen now, certainly not in the immediate future. Hancock got the obligatory doorstepping after Cummings had finished and received the summons to answer an urgent question in the House yesterday. He dealt with both and, for now, the PM and the Party have rowed in behind him.
We continue to be in COVID learning mode from a more positive aspect. The way the NHS and our sector responded and the perception that we are not, after all, averse to the rapid adoption of innovation have reinforced the belief inside government that ours is an industry which has a huge role to play in our country’s future prosperity. The language has changed. Remember the Industrial Strategy? The phrase has become one of those now verboten by Cabinet Office bruisers. As well as being so last Prime Minister, it always struck me as just a little bit Soviet. There is just now the small matter of a government department with Industrial Strategy in its name. Still, we no longer call British Petroleum British Petroleum, it is just BP, so I suppose it is now just BEIS, well, nobody ever knew what it stood for anyway. Enter the Sector Visions. And the good news is, the Life Sciences is one of five to have been commissioned by the PM. The Advisory Group, Chaired by Sir John Bell, kicked off on Monday with the usual stark raving bonkers timelines, but we are in good shape. The essence of our latest report (watch this space) has been shared with officials and will help inform the Innovation Manifesto which will comprise the operational bit of the Vision for HealthTech. Messages are already landing and lobbying underway for resource commitments in the Spending Review to have our name on them. If you want a more lucid exposition of how all these elements fit together, tune in next week when I will be somewhere in the Cotswolds with cider, and Ellie will be here to put the new Not Industrial Strategy into context.
That just leaves me to bid you a great long weekend, a peaceful half term if that affects you and, without wishing to jinx it, pleasant and safe enjoyment of the anticipated decent weather.
